How do we manage appropriateness?

What happens when things ‘do’ go right? Sounds like a strange question but there can be ramifications that we haven’t thought of  before. Why?


Control is something that individuals with special needs frequently, if not a lot of their days give over to others. Then there comes the component that they might not have control over their own bodies in the first place.

So when do they feel in control? So when does something happen that feels right? But that’s not the original question:

What is the difference between what is right versus what is appropriate? Or do we need to add even more words to talk about this?

Is it appropriate for me to ask for ‘more’ of something when I already have enough?

Is it appropriate for me to hold on longer with a hug when we’ve already had a ‘typical’ length of hug?

I am tired, so is it appropriate for me to not go to school today or is there a ‘correct’ answer where I can definitively say that yes I should go to school or no I should not go to school.


How do I know so that I can make an appropriate decision?

Whose measurement system are we using?

Your own personal one.

Your families one.

A generally accepted one.

A medical professionals one.

The medical associations one.

International research bodies one.

World Health Organisations one.

or do you go back to your own one?  Yet. Does that work for you? Are you successful using it? Why? In what situations does this level of action / decision mean that this works for you and in what situations does it not work for you?


I use the phrase ‘not ok’ all the time with the kids so that I can give quick feedback, or I use the words ‘ that’s not appropriate’.  But I am an OT. So I have already taken the time to explain in appropriate level of detail the context of why I am suggesting to them as their OT what is appropriate or not. Yet where did I get the knowledge about the appropriate level of detail. I know. Can you answer this question yourself? Or do you need me to summarise what I’ve done in my professional career and what I’ve been through and have been involved in personally? Do you get it yet??


Problem for you to ‘think’ through, not act on: Orphanage Bobrovo – With the money that the beds cost – what other options would you consider using instead? What does the research say is the appropriate thing to do in the short term? In the long term?

Now consider it. Is it the lifestyle or the food? So now where do you focus your money on? I don’t know the answer yet. But what I do know is that I need to be able to get on a plane and travel without interference. The media isn’t stopping us from doing our job. Its the people who needed to be entrapped and needed to go to jail. They are the reason we have not started visibly yet.